Live Blogging From The Meeting

I've commandeered a laptop so that I'm not completely bored here during this meeting. With that in mind I will live blogging the mundane and boring meeting of bureaucrats who educate my customers on the facets of certain aspects of their jobs.

To give you a lil background, I work as an contracted IT Monkey for a DoD group. I won't say what exactly, we'll call it the Docce effect, but they are involved with the closing of military bases. Today we are joined by four or five people in various fields explaining red tape, acronyms, and other facets of government life.

8:52-This shindig has been going on for forty-five minutes now and I've seen six different acronyms. This more or less sums up why no one in their right mind can understand how the government works.

8:56-Conversing with EaZy E I just said the following which I found amusing, "like the short fat bitch said in poltergeist, all are welcome". I crack myself up.

8:58-Apparently I am the only one in this meeting who can read the big sign at the front of the room that says Please keep all questions until session end. I don't know what's worse, the illiteracy rate in this room or the moderator acting like a caveman with a laptop.

9:06-Only at the Federal Government can you see Power Point slides that read like a novel and reads worse then a chemistry book.

9;33-I took morning constitutional in the lavatory and I saw the culprit. As most men know there's nothing more annoying then going to a public restroom and someone had pissed on the seat. This young man, acting like he was in quite a hurry and more important then he really is, races and goes into the first stall. Mind you there are three urinals completely open. I'm washing my hands and notice that this jackass has not raised the seat. I mean really, is it that hard to simply raise the seat you disgusting bastard?

9:45-Question time since they finished early before the first break. I feel like I am an extra in something that would be shown on C-SPAN 6, Mind Numbing Government meetings.

9:50-The director is now sitting in front of me, giving me either the ole evil eye or wondering why the hell I am here. Hopefully I can still do this after the break.

9:55-WOOOOHOOO! Our first case of emphatic arm movements while talking, this is Emmy gold! Will continue after this break, same boring time same boring channel. Well, I guess not the same time. Look for the next update around noon.